I Like When You Poke Me

There is a new(ish) frontier in flirting.
Not really new...

It started in 2004 and has been public since 2006, and is the most popular social networking sight on the interwebs.

No one will be surprised by this, but it is Facebook.
Obviously.

 

Everyone and their mom has a facebook these days. And everyone and their mom is using it to flirt with people who they wanna see naked. 

I doubt that it is an outlandish statement to anyone, but it still catches me off guard when it happens to me. I often feel like the only people who use facebook for flirting are either 13-year-olds who don't know any better, 45-year-olds who don't understand texting, and people without any shame or who haven't realized that everyone can see when they post "watup sexxxi?" to someone's wall.

Other indicators include: 

When someone randomly "likes" a picture of you...especially if it is a picture that has been sitting around your profile for 6 months or 3 years. 

Or when they start a "poke war" with you and include little comments like " ; ) " or " ; P " or "lol."
I understand that poke wars can occur between siblings and friends too, but when you're just hanging around and someone pokes you...that isn't a great sign about their chaste intentions.

Doesn't that just look like an invitation to imagine someone naked?

Facebook has created more than just a new flirting opportunity, it has also opened up a world of stalking.
In the past, a stalker was someone who followed you around and took creepy pictures through the bushes of you drinking coffee or getting in and out of taxis. Now it seems that a stalker can do just as much following and being creepy from their couch. They can check your facebook to see who you are with and where, and to download new photos of you in your bathing suit, they can check your twitter to learn your feelings about the new Transformers movie, and they can check your Pinterest page (that's a thing, right?) to see what you like.

It's SO easy to be creepy now, and I don't know what to do about it.

You meet someone at a party, learn at leas their first name, and start searching through the host's facebook  friends to find them. Then you click 8 different profiles before finding the one that matches the person you met. You search around their photos and mutual friends (less than 3, it'll be weird to add them, more than 15 and you're golden, FYI) and then decide what to do about it. Send a cheeky message? Just add them as a friend? WHAT TO DO?

General (personal) guideline: wait until the second or third meeting (especially until they have given you their last name or phone number) before finding them on facebook. Otherwise you might seem over eager. 

Personally, if I'm going to flirt with someone not face to face, it's going to be over text, not facebook. Or maybe I'll do it through emails... or telegraph messages...or maybe smoke signals but that requires me to leave the couch.


Moral of the story: Whatever way you wanna make overtures, make sure you end up giving 'em a good "poke." Get it? Get it?